Crazy
by Idol-Reject-Crazy-Angel
Summary: This is a very strange story....dont read it if you cant stand retarded things. What happens when the yu yu gang are on the run from a hit man named edward elric! And Have to stay in a house with 2 girls! Warning: half the people die in the first paragra
1. Chapter 1

IDOL-REJECT-CRAZY-ANGEL(IRCA): hello I am sooooooooooooooooooooooo slap hAppy cause its really late at night and I can't sleep! LOL Anyway this Idea came to me head! Its about me and my friend and what happens to us when the guys from Yu yu hakusho come to live with us! Plus a few other people might show up! Oh i am so tired!

And part of this was typed by her best friend, AKA Narcissa. I also edited about half of it... silly Ryoko!

Just so you know

Me(IRCA): Ryo

Laura: Narcissa

One Bright Sunny Day:

A very large nice house sat innocently on a hill looking out over a beach, it had at last three floors in it not including the basement and was painted purple! (Yes purple! with blue shutters!) In this massive house there lived two young girls and there pet komodo dragon. One girl's name was Narcissa but everyone caled her NarNar for short. She was 15 and had long blond hair and green eyes. Now NarNar had a very nice attitude, but... could be a little strange sometimes. She took on most of the responsibilities in the house, and was glad to do it (since doing these things actually made the house hers). The other girl was more different. Her name was Ryoko, but just like Narcissa she too had a nickname! People just clled her Ryo or Kuu if the situation called for it. She to had green eyes but had shorter lengh hair that was brown. She tended to be more care free and stranger then other people would like you to be. In short she was an idjet or so Narcissa said. And finally there was the pet Komodo dragon named Skid. He was really Ryo's pet since Narcissa had the house but we won't go into the who owns what argument. Well in this small little house,near a small little forest,where two small girls lived peacfuly is where our not so small story begins!

Koenma's Office:

A very agitated Yuske sat around with his group of friends (Kurama/Hiei/Kuwabara) waiting to hear what Koenma had to say about there situation. It seemed that the demon mafia had set out to make sure that our gang of detectives swim with the fishys! And Koenma had decided that they were to go into hiding! Where to was what they had left to decide. Finally Koenma came out. "Alright! We will decide randomly!" Koenma said "WHAT, RANDOMLY?" Yuske yelled "HOW DO YOU CHOSE RANDOMLY WHERE WE HAVE TO HIDE!" Koenma sighed and pulled out a spinner wheel "I will decide with this you twit! Now who would like to spin the wheel?" the tiny prince asked. "I Will! We'll need my good luck to get us through this!" Kuwabara yelled!

5 mins later...

"NICE GOING KUWABARA YOU GOT US LIVING IN THE MIDDLE OF NO WHERE WITH TWO GIRLS!" Yuske AND Hiei yelled at the red haired oaf! Kurama sighed "Well I hope thire nice" he sighed.

Ryo+Nar's House

"RYO DONT TOUCH THE OVEN!" an agitated female voice yelled into the kitchen where a mischiviouse Ryoko sat messing with the knobs on the oven. "RYO I MEAN IT! IF YOU SO MUCH AS MOVE THAT TEMPATURE KNOB A MILLIMETER I WILL CHOP OFF YOUR FINGERS!" Narcissa yelled. Ryo giggled and turned the knob up 200 degrees or so. Narcissa roared with rage and stomped down to the kitchen but stopped midway as the whole kitchen exploded with smoke. Narcisa sighed as a smoky Ryo-chan tummbled out or the room and looked up innocently at her house mate. "Sorry Nar its not my fault! The oven went ballistic and then exploded!" She said. Narsica truned red then grabbed Ryoko by the scruff of her neck and draged her upstairs and threw her into her room and slammed the door. "Stay in there while I clean the house! We have people coming with us to stay for a while and I don't want them to think we live in a barn!" Narcissa said through the door. Ryo's perked up "People are coming to stay with us?" She asked "Yes they will be renting the rooms we have avalible, now please behave yourself! IDJET!" Nar hissed through the door.

A few hours later...

The gang of detectives came stumbling through the door with their suitcases and stuff. "So this is it, huh?" Yuske said looking around. "This is rather charming if I do say so myself" Kurama added. Hiei frowned. "Wonder where the kitchen is." "I'm starved!" Kuwabara mouped. Suddenly Narcissa came rumming down the stair case looking rather tired from the cleaning she had done. "Welcome! I'll show you to your rooms!" She said escorting the gang into the house. Kurama and Kuwabara were on the second floor while Yuske had perferred the room in the basement, leaving Hiei with a room on the third floor where Ryo and Nar's rooms were.

In the living room Ryo sat idly playing with her video camera. Narcissa walked in "Guests are here." She said walking into the basement to check on Yuske. Ryo rolled her eyes and went to her room. She was walking around the third floor video taping things when she suddenly smacked into Hiei. "AHHHH!" Ryo screamed, accidently zooming in on Hiei's face. Hiei gasped at the intruder. "What are you doing!"

LAURA'S TURN! BUT FIRST SHE'LL CORRECT IRCA"s SPELLING ERRORS!

OKAY!

IRCA: Theres not that many...reads over fic Okay maybe theres a few.

Ryoko looked at Hiei. "Hmm... he's pretty cute... for a demon" she thought to herself. In reality, she glared at him and said, "What are YOU doing?" Hiei snorted at her. "I don't have to explain myself to you, human!" Flames shot out of Ryo's eyes. "I AM THE PRINCESS OF THE HIGHMOON CLAN I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW!" she yelled at him, snapping shut the videocamera, then stalked off to her room. Hiei eyed her shut door. "That must be the one called... Ryoko..." He said musingly, then went to his room to meditate. Meanwhile, Narcissa edited the online post that said there were five rooms free down to one. Suddenly, a small window popped up asking for the rental rate for the house. Puzzled, Narcissa typed it in, then recieved another post saying that that room was now claimed and that someone would be there soon. Narcissa smiled to herself, then shut off the computer and went to sit on the porch. Suddenly, Edward Elric, the Full Metal Alchemist walked up with a small black suitcase and smiled at her. "This is the place, correct?" he asked. Narcissa nodded, eyeing him, and was extremely pleased with what she saw. "Your room is next to mine, the first one on the left. Ryoko and... Hiegay's room are on the other side." He smirked a bit. "Who are your other tenants?" "Um... Hiegay, Kuran, Karabura, and Yousfu." She said, thinking quickly, then led him up to his room and went to sit on her balcony for a bit.

Edward, meanwhile, was plotting how best to kill the foursome. As he was the evil assasin dude. (And unfortunately... Narcissa was falling for him!) He adjusted his gloves nervously, then went out to his balcony and saw Narcissa several feet down. "Maybe it would be beneficial for me if i had someone in the household on my side... I'll get her!" he thought to himeslf, then jumped onto the balcony next to her. She looked at him and blinked twice. "Is there anything I can get for you?" She asked. "I just wanted some company to talk with." Ed said. Meanwhile... Hiei had the same idea with Ryo-chan. He snuck into her room... she was sleeping... she looked so innocent... and Hiei proceeded to remove that innocence... the white stains were there for days... and then RYO WAS PREGNANT! And... Edward de-blossomed Narcissa as well... and unfortunately, the guys became emotionally attatched to the girls. So when Ed began to fight with the others... the girls stepped in. Kurama admitted he was gay with Kuwabara in a flurry of passion, and Yuske revealed his hair was a toupee, really little toguro. The girls and everyone else was destroyed! The house burned for fifteen days!

LAURA:FOOLED YA! This is what really happened...

IRCA: THANK GOD!

Hiei and Ryoko started talking about their pasts, and Narcissa and Ed did the same. When they finally left each other's company, the moon was well out. They all went to bed. The next morning, Hiei and Ryoko both started munching on Rasin Bran. Pretty soon, they were both chanting "RASIN BRAN RASIN BRAN RYO AND HIEI LIKE RASIN BRAN!" Narcissa and Ed just looked at each other, then simultaneously reached for the donughts. A small fight ensued, resulting in Narcissy sitting on top of Ed's head with a box of doughnuts. After listening to Ed whimper for a few minutes, she reached down and fed him a donught, then left the room. Ed stared after her, then went outside and started stretching. Yuske, Kurama and Kuwabara left to go and check on their gang territory back in Makai, after having wrestled over the bacon. Hiei, after watching Ed stretch for a bit, went out and asked him to spar. Narcissa and Ryoko went out to watch... wild ogres mud wrestle in thongs... and Ryoko recorded it and sold it to Playboy online. Then they went to watch the guys spar. Finally, after a while, both guys were sweaty, shirtless, messy-haired, wearing only baggy pants and boots, and had several small cuts on their arms and chests. They nodded to each other respectfully, then walked over to where the girls were now suntanning in swimsuits. The guys looked at each other and got twin evil smirks. Hiei grabbed Ryoko, Ed grabbed Narcissa, and they threw them into the lake. Then they picked up the towels and proceeded to dry themselves off. Ryo and Narcissa looked at each other simultaneously as they flew towards the water, and then sprouted angel wings. Narcissa's were pure black, and Ryoko had one black one white. Unfortunately... they hit the water too soon and were soaked. Hiei and Ed looked at each other and laughed, then went over to the edge and offered the girls a hand. Yeah... the guys were dragged into the water as well. After a long and messy water fight, a pixie suddenly appeared in front of Narcissa. "Message! Yuske, Kurama, and Kuwabara were all killed in a fight! End of Message!" and then the pixie dissappeared. Hiei looked at Ryoko, then went up to his room quietly. Ed frowned at his retreating back. Narcissa sighed and said, "Now we have free rooms again..." and went inside to re-post online the vacancy. Ed sighed and went up to his room to take a shower. And Ryoko made a small fire.

IRCA typing again...

Ed sighed and suddenly collapsed, had spasms, drooled a bit then died. THE END. (A/N: LAURA SCREAMED NOOOOO AND BROUGHT HIM BACK)

LAURA: Never mind. Narcissa continuing... because Ryo does not want to type. Try again later.

IRCA: No dont wanna nope nope.

Hiei, after meditating a bit, went to his balcony and sniffed. "I smell... fire... and the smell of that Ryoko person..." he said, then wrinkled his nose, then smiled. He jumped down (two stories! Eek!) and snuck up behind the unsuspecting Ryoko. "BOO!" he shouted, in a very un-Hieiish move. Ryoko jumped and eeked, then spun around and glared at him. He smiled innocently at her, then knelt down in front of the small fire. "That's a small fire." he said. Ryoko (just spazzed) looked at him and said sourly "Let's see you make it bigger!" "Turn around." he said, and she did so. She heard the rustle of cloth and a small hiss, then a large explosion. When she turned around, Hiei had a slightly dreamy satisfied look on his face and the fire was blazing merrily as he tied his belt back. (A/N: He peed on the fire, for all those as... never mind.. as Ryo here is. Fire demons have gas pee.) Ryoko smiled and proceeded to make some S'Mores... (A/N: This is Ryo: " I HATE S"MORES! I HATE S"MORES! PUT THAT IN I HATE S"MORES!" this is Narcissa: "..." --u) And she somehow managed to get the (A/N: We're sitting here talking about peeling skin and that guy from Austin Powers Goldmember who ate his skin... do you like Austin Powers? That's the fun thing about having two tired psychotic teenagers typing a fanfic, it gets... sidetracked... LOL!) sticky white marshmallow stuff on her fingers but didn't really notice. Hiei looked at her hand, then twitched a little bit, figuring she'd notice on her own. Unfortunately, we're talking about Ryoko her. I mean come on, she's askin me if i want to eat her sunburned skin flakes. ANYWAYS he finally said, "You have marshmellow on your hand..." She looked at him, then down at her hand, then back up at him. "Yeah, and?" she asked. "It's annoying me... " he said sourly. "Hee hee hee then I'm definitely keeping it on" Ryo thought to herself, then continued to watch the fire. Hiei, after a few more minutes watching her hand, finally grabbed it and said "Don't move." He then proceeded to clean the marshmellow off her hand with... his mouth! Yummy... not! Ryoko, watching him, twitched a little bit because she's special, she never wants the guy she likes to know, so she frowned and yanked her hand back. Hiei looked up at her, mischeviousness sparkling in crimson eyes, and continued to clean her hand... then after she was sufficiently red-faced, he stood up, licked his lips, and went to bed.

LAURA: For now, this is stoppin! See you... I probably wont add much more to this... oh apparently she's gonna have me over more to finish... DARN! I mean... yeah... FUN!

IRCA: HEY SEE IF I EVER INVITE YOU OVER AGAIN! . my friends hate me? And by the way we have flame resistant cloths ao if you hated the story thus far go ahead and flame. I fear no burn no matter how bad. umm...please dont hate me for writing this.


	2. Chapter 2

IRCA: O.O someone liked it! OMG! THAT FING ROX! You the best alchemist4kumoguro. And yes Ed is evil, so for all you fangirls just imagin Ed in the sexiest black outfit you can picture, then imagine him wrinkling his noise like a bunnie with dark slitted eyes...hot huh? LOL. Luara is home so I am going to troop on by myself for right now.

Oh and of course: I DON'T OWN YU YU HAKUSHO, OR ED ELRIC (neither dose laura no matter how much she wants Ed)

Ed went slowly down the hallway to his room. Suddenly he felt an errie presence about the hall. He turned and thouht he saw a shadow but nothing was there! Ed shifted his wieght from one foot to the other and slowly brought out a small dagger from his coat. If this was one of his assasination targets then he would kill then right here and now. Suddenly a shadow erupted from the corner of the hall and can crawling tords ed at a rapid speed. Ed saw a lamp next to him and flipped it on FAST! The shadow stopped and in its place there was a 7ft long Komodo dragon named Skid happily looking up at him with cuteness in his face. Ed blinked at the stange creature. Skid blinked to then let out a loud but happy sounding noise that sounded like this: EEeeeeeEEEhhhHHHHhhHHHhPPPPPPooooooooo. Ed flinched. Skid looked up at Ed like he were a child waiting to be omplimented on his great performance. Ed nodded, and suddenly Skid jumped on him and started licking his face LIKE A DOG! "GAH! HELP ME SOMEONE KILLER REPTILE! COME QUICK HES STARTING TO LICK LOWER!" Ed screamed! "SKID!" A voice came from infront of Ed. Ryoko stood bewilderd by what she say. Skid looked up and quickly bounded to her feet rolling over like he wanted his belly rubbed. Ryoko bent down and started cuddling the komodo dragon, smothering it with kisses "Ohhhh Your such a good little dragon aren't you! You got our house guest good didn't you! YES! Drooled all over Mr.Elric! Serves him right for trying to get in NarNar's pance. YES hes did!" Ryo smiled now full on wrestling with Skid. Ed got up quickly and went to his room muttering something about needing to an insane asylum here.

Meanwhile Narcissa decided to take a walk on the beach and think about thing, things like the laundry needing done, house cleaning, the price of rice and spice in Romanina, Ed's hot body, Renting out rooms (kwabara,kurama,and yuske won't be needing thiers anymore) Ed's lips, how much she'd like to spank him right now, taxes, car insurance, the usual things people have to think of. Well she was walking along when suddenly she tripped and fell on a rock. Or so she thought. narcisa turned around and saw a gigantic clam just sitting on the beach reading entertainment magizien. The clam looked up at Nar and snorted "Watch where your going fool" Narcissa blinked. "what are you doing out here you stupid clam!" She hissed. The clam spun around in his shell "I Am NO Clam!" It yelled "I am A muscle! MUSCLE! Do You Know how many people call me clam!" Narcissa nodded no. the cla...I MEAN...muscle sighed "I'm Manfred the wishing muscle" He said slowly. "Wishing mucsle?" Narcissa repeated. "Yes whishing muscle, you rub me you get a wish, or thats what they say...yah I don't know for sure." Narcissa tilted her head. "wanna try?" The muscle asked. Narcissa stared for a while then shrugged and bent down to rub the cla...I mean muscles sea worn shell wish sea slim covering it so that is looked a gringy green. she rubbed the shell slowly as the slim built up around her fingures. The smell the muscle gave of was repulsive! Like dog poopie with a mix of lime! EWW! Narcissa tried her hardest not to throw up. "Ohh thats the way" The muscles sighed. Narcissa blinked. Suddenly the muscle started to glow green, it lifted up into the air and was ingulfed in the light. When it started to decend the clam had transformed into a tiny little bird with blue fethers and tiny beak. Narcissa clinked "WTF IS THIS ALL ABOUT!" She screamed, "I WAS SUPPOSE TO GET A WISH! NOT TURN YOU INTO A CUTE LITTLE BIRD!" The muscle who was now a cute bird about the size of a football blinked. "Well I dont Understand either! What did you wish for?" The bird asked Narcissa frowned "Well...I kinda got distracted...my stomach was growling so bad cause I'm so hungry that I couldn't make the wish properly." she said. The innocent little bird blinked "Are you kidding?" It asked. Narcisa nodded no then looked down at her tummy which had just let out a rather large growl. Narcissa frowned and looked at the bird and suddenly got an evil idea. "Hmmm...bird sounds good to eat right now." She said as her cat ears and claws came out. The bird twiched "no...NO NO NO NO!" hes said trying to fly away...but...it was all to late. With-in five minutes the bird was aten and narcissa sat happily sunning herself on the beach before the sun went down"

Meanwhile Ryo had went to bed and Skid had acompanyed her into her room flopping down on the smaller bed in the corner with his name on it."Goodnight Skid! Sleep tight!" she smiled. Skid EEEEeeeeeehhhhHHHHHHPPPPPoooopppooooo'ed and then went to sleep. Three hours later: ryoko layed sleeping in bed. When suddenly a black shadow appeared in the window. Ryo mummbled something then rolled over in her sleep. Hiei stepped down from the window and moved twords ryo's bed. he looked around not noticing Skid in the corner. He bent down near Ryo and moved the hair out of her face. At this time skid had woken up. He let out a low growl hiei didn't hear because he was to interested in what he was doing. Skid moved slowly twords Hiei, nobody messed with his Ryo. Hiei was still consentrating on Ryo. Suddenly Hiei let out a blood freezing scream. Ryo shot up out of bed and screamed. Hiei was twiching and shaking in pain. He looked down at where his man parts were, and there was Skid. Hiei tried to say something but nothing came out. His eyes crossed and Skid let go and Hiei fell on the bed. "SKID! HIEI! WHAT IS UP WITH THAT?" She said grabbing Hiei and shaking him gently. "NARCISSA! HELP! HIEI's HURT!" She screamed. Narcissa came running in and helped Ryo get Hiei to the hospital wing. There he was put in a healing chamber. Ryo sat in the hospital wing for the night. Skid at her side. "SKID!" Why did you have to do that?" She asked looking down at the dragon. Skid snorted and glared at Hiei then to Ryo and snorted again. Ryo rolled her eyes. She walked over to the tank where Hiei was. Good thing you didn't take it off and just shook him up a bit. She said looking at her komodo. Skid almost seemed to smile and lick his lips. "Ehhhhh...your a sick little dragon aren't you" Ryo sighed. Soon later Hiei can out good ( I can see all the fangirls sighing with relife about that!) as new and ready to kill Skid. He pulled out his katana and started walking twords Ryo"s darling pet. Ryo realized what was happening and got between him and Skid. "Let me through!" Hiei hissed. "ARE YOU INSANE! THATS MY BABY!" she yelled. Hiei pushed Ryo out of the way. Skid hised and got ready to fight. Ryo tryed to stop Hiei again. She ran right in front of him and grabbed his waist "NO!" She yelled trying to use athority in her voice. Hiei kept walking with Ryo still in front of him! Ryo had to act quick, she looked up at Hiei and leaned forward...and used this motion to kick Hiei in the nuts. Hiei twiched then looked at Ryo "No...Fare" He hissed falling on his knees. Ryo bent down and tryed to comfort him. Hiei twiched and slowly got up and waddled to the door. Ryo sat in the middle of the floor frowning. Skid was wagging his tail happily.


	3. Chapter 3

CHAPITRE THREE! As typed by Narcissa, or Blood Moon Spinstress! Mua ha ha ha… let us once again follow the misguided adventures of the two sisters and their houseguests! Ryo wont have any hand in this chunk of adventure, as she expressly told me to type this! Poor girl… I'm hyper tonight… so just bear with me! If you have half as much fun reading this as I did typing it, you'll… have a lot of fun!

Hmm where were we? Ah yes… Sprit detective Yuske Urameshi, his odd lovesick pompadouring friend Kuwabara, and their feministic male friend Kurama had been killed in a turf war when they returned to Makai to check up and plan with Lord of Spirit world, the all-powerful midget baby type thingy Koenma! (A/N: yeah so I'm not respectful to him… so what? He sucks something that looks an awful lot like a pacifier!) The threesome, along with the three eyed demon midget Hiei (A/N: come on you know I love him anyways -.-U), were sent to hide in the human world from a new group of demon menaces by Koenma himself. However, the location where they were sent was far from safe! They went to the house of Narcissa Darkmoon and Ryoko Highmoon (A/N: Ryo and I bow to the cheering- no wait… booing audience! --u), taking up four of the five vacancies! The last vacancy was taken by none other than the hot headed midgetated alchemist Edward Elric (A/N: Oh yeah! You def. know I love Ed…) who is an unknown to YOU factor whom has charmed the heart of kindly and responsible Narcissa! Hiei, on the other hand, began to charm the volatile and hyper-psychotically-dangerous-to-everyone-around-her Ryoko (A/N: MUA HA HA!), apparently also having to do with the crazy komodo dragon Skid. And much as she may make it seem I'm not THAT obsessed with Ed (pretty close tho.). That's the summary folks, hold on to your seats and let your popcorn fly up and splat the people in all the rows behind you! hee hee heee

Since I can't remember exactly where we left off, here's a general start: The next morning, pandemonium reigned. Koenma had decided to pay an early personal visit to the house to check up on security and collect Yuske, Kuwabara and Kurama's stuff. Narcissa, having dragged herself out of bed and gotten dressed in ultra baggy side pocketed jeans, black combat boots and a dark green tank top, had finally made it down the stairs and saw Ryoko, wearing a pair of low rise jeans and a black tank top with a pair of sandals rolling around on the ground laughing her bum off while Hiei, in a pair of ultra baggy black pants and his trademark black boots attempted to put out a small fire in his hair. Ed was standing in the corner wearing a bathrobe, trying to stay out of the way while muzzily eating a bowl of cocoa puffs. Every time Hiei came running over, Ed had to dodge and maintain his balance while keeping Hiei from dumping his cereal on his head to put out the sizzling flames. Ryoko was slipping her trusty lighter into her pocket when Narcissa grabbed her wrist and glared at her. "What the heck did you do that for?" Narcissa snapped as she grabbed Hiei with her other hand and, not paying attention, dunked him headfirst into the soapy dishwater. Ed looked at the legs and small column of smoke coming out of the sink, grinned wryly, put his bowl in the sudsy water, and went back upstairs to shave and get ready for the day. Meanwhile, Ryoko was rubbing her toe into the tile of the kitchen floor and trying to avoid Nar's stare. "Um…" she said evasively, "Look! It's the muskrat!" Narcissa whipped her head around, snarling, "Where is that repulsive rodent who likes to make our lives so much trouble?" While Narcissa was looking away, Ryo ran back upstairs, and the sound of her door slamming and maniacal laugher were then heard. "I don't think I can take this anymore," Narcissa moaned, leaning up against the counter, as Hiei resurfaced. "All I did was ask her what her pills were for!" He said confusedly. (A/N: LOL…long story…) "Oh that explains it." Narcissa said, and grabbed a bottle of Gatorade as she walked outside and to the pond. "That explains it?" Hiei spluttered, then Koenma reappeared in front of him and said, "The defense checks up! You should be safe here. I'm going for now but you know how to contact me if you need to." Hiei did one of his trademark snorts and said, "I need no one." Koenma sighed and disappeared. Hiei looked around, then sighed and started doing the pile of dishes.

Five minutes later… the trademark sounds of an electric guitar sounded through out the house… horridly off-key. Hiei winced sympathetically as he listened to someone trying and failing miserably to tune it. Finally, he walked upstairs and knocked on Ryo's door. She opened it and glared out at him. "What." He snorted and said, "I came to see if you'd like some help tuning your guitar." She looked at him, then said, "Fine…" He walked down to his room, grabbed his own guitar, then went back to her room and looked around. It was simply elegant. There was a little bit of a clothing mess on the floor though. He walked over to the bed and sat down, the gently picked up the guitar sitting next to it and strummed it experimentally. A few moments later, he had it perfectly in tune. Ryo regarded him coolly, then grabbed it back and strummed it herself. She nodded respectfully at him, then eyed his guitar. He picked it up and strummed a short and simple melody. She responded by starting a newer song, and he joined in with a countermelody. Soon the sound of guitars filled the house. "Perfect cover…" Ed thought to himself, and pulled out a small transmitter. He flicked it on, and a small image of a hooded man appeared. "Master, I have infiltrated the house and am working on forming basic relationships with the target and civilians." He said tonelessly. "Good… they'll never suspect that you are the spy sent to kill the demon…" The master said. "Continue according to our plan." Then the hologram disappeared. Ed hid the transmitter back amongst his clothing in the dresser and then walked outside. "Continue according to our plans… and let nothing stand in the way." He thought darkly, staring at Nar as she chased a butterfly.

Ooh dontcha feel bad for Nar an Hiei and Ryo now? Don't… there's gona be more twists in this story than in a longhaired tight perm! Flicks her heavy metal music up from "Stun" to "Kill" and continues typing grimly

Hmmkay. Krang I'm hungry… goes to get donut

While Hiei and Ryo play, and Narcissa runs around like a kid, and Ed plots evilly, Lord Koenma is sitting in a chair grinning smugly and watching all the scenes unfold. "Oh yes… my little spy… kill Hiei and then we can take over Spirit world, then nothing will be able to stop us on our conquest of the human world! Too bad that Hiei wont kill innocents… he'd have been rather useful. Now he's just trash to be swept out of the way…" Koenma reverted to his teenaged form and laughed long and evilly… (A/N: Betcha didn't see THAT coming!) Then went for his daily nap. CUT TO: me spassing out and smacking her computer to kill the large black ant crawling on it. CUT TO: Hiei finally stops playing and looks at Ryoko. "You play incredibly well." He said slowly. She looked at him proudly, then shrugged and said, "Well you don't totally suck yourself." He sighed quietly, then picked up his guitar and walked out of her room and down to his own. She blinked twice, slightly confused, then continued to strum her guitar. Even Narcissa heard the scream of pain. She sighed and slapped her forehead with the palm of her hand, muttering "What's Ryoko gone and done to herself now?" then pretended to not have heard the scream. Ed, holding his chest to calm his racing heart, stared up at the house in confusion. "She wasn't in my room so it had nothing to do with me" he muttered, and then sat down on a rock to calm back down. Hiei spazzed out and ran down the hall, skidding to a halt outside Ryo's door. "What happened?" He asked worriedly. She looked up at him, then showed him her cut up fingertips. He sighed, then gently stuck Band-Aids with healing gel on each one. She sniffled a bit, and then muttered "Thank you" quietly. He sighed and nodded a reply, then said, "I'm off to Makai to get my katana repaired, it mysteriously broke last night." and disappeared in a poof of black smoke. He didn't see her twitch slightly and say "Oops…"

Ryoko frowned and sighed. "Well, how was I to know that slamming a sword into a large heavy rock will break it?" She said sourly, then crawled back into bed and fell asleep. Moo Goo Gai Pan! What does that have to do with the story, you ask? Well… you see… absolutely nothing! How dare you try to sidetrack me… now where were we? Ah yes… Narcissa looked at Ed sitting alone on a rock, wearing baggy blue jeans and a white wife beater with tennis shoes, and blinked twice, then got an idea. "Hey Ed," She called as she walked over, "How'd you like to go to the mall with me?" Ed blinked twice bemusedly, then nodded. "Hey, how about we take my motorcycle?" He asked. She blinked twice, and then nodded. After a careful ride to the mall, where Nar blushed the whole way because Ed was ripped and she "had to keep her arms around his waist for balance", they were at the place with everything… the mall! Narcissa immediately dragged Ed off, to the Arcade! After much begging, she finally got him to agree to play a game with her… any game of her choice. LOL… poor Ed… She immediately walked over to the raised "Dance Dance Revolution" stage and grinned at him. He got a large scared look and slowly started backing away, but the crowd shoved him forward. He reluctantly got on the second pad, and Narcissa put in the tokens. "Just don't pick an embarrassing song PLEASE," he asked pleadingly. All she did was laugh maniacally and put on the wristbands that recorded your hand movements as well as your foot movements. Ed gulped and put on his. "You picked 'Barbie Girl' by Aqua!" (A/N: It's the song that everyone has on their computer play list but is embarrassed about!) the computer voice announced. "Oh god…" Ed said as the music started. "Hi Ed!" Narcissa said cheerfully in reply. "Can we do something else PLEASE?" Ed said. "No Ed!" Narcissa said, and then the beat kicked in and the arrows started flashing. Ed sighed, and then slammed straight into the song. He and Narcissa danced the whole song in perfect unison, which if you've ever seen the hand and foot movements to that song it's darn near impossible! When the song ended, Ed looked at her and sighed. She smiled at him and giggled, then pointed up at the screen as the announcer said, "Here's a replay of that, folks!" As Ed watched them dancing in unison, he had to admit that they looked good together. Narcissa looked at him and grinned, then ran off to play another game. After a while, they went off to the food court to grab something to eat.

Meanwhile… Ryoko rolled over in her sleep and continued to breathe slowly and deeply, unaware of the black shadow standing next to her bed. "It was broken by someone with very small hands slamming it into something hard." The words of the sword smith ran though Hiei's head as he watched her sleep. "But why would she break my sword?" he wondered to himself. Why is this four pages (and counting!) I myself wonder? She sighed happily in her sleep, and, as she does, as I know from hearing it myself, she muttered "Hiei" ever so softly in her sleep. He jumped slightly and froze, but she was still sleeping. "Curious." Hiei muttered to himself, then walked back down the hall to his room and replaced his katana on the stand. He looked out the window boredly, then leapt out into the tree and sat down in the crook of it. He looked up at the sky, which was steadily clouding over, then muttered "rain's coming." A slight pattering of it made him leap back into the house, and as it started pouring he ran around and closed windows, then went and sat in the observatory to watch the thunderstorm. Meanwhile, Narcissa and Ed were speeding down the freeway to try and beat the storm when it struck. They were both totally soaked immediately, and pulled into the driveway through about an inch of rain. The ocean was all stormy and lightning occasionally flashed across the sky. Narcissa lightly jumped off the back of the motorcycle and walked over towards the beach as Ed put away his motorcycle and went to stand by the door. "Are you coming?" He called. "In a bit…" She called, then peeled off her boots and started dancing in the rain because I actually do that. He sighed, watching her, then mentally slapped himself and went inside. Suddenly, a waterspout appeared on the ocean near the beach. Nar yelped and started to run inside, but it split in half and one raced in front of her, then they started circling around her. Hiei, watching from the observatory, gasped. A large crack of thunder woke Ryo up and sent her racing to the window, where she started laughing. Ed ran back outside, clapped his hands, then slammed them into the beach. A wall of sand appeared and stopped both waterspouts. Narcissa ran over to him, and started giggling. "What a rush…" she said. Ed glared at her and said, "You need to be more careful!" She smiled at him and said, "Aww, was you worried about me, little Eddykins?" He glared at her, then stomped up to his room. "Apparently…" She said quietly to herself, frowning, and sighed quietly as she watched the sky clear up.

To bed for me… for now… But rest assured, tomorrow I'll type the afternoon and the wonderful little Hiei and Ryo plot idea I have! twenty four hours later . Sweet I got my new books… Artemis Fowl and the Opal Deception, Full Metal Alchemist 2, XXX Holic, Princess Ai 2, and Yu Yu Hakusho 7! And so here is the next part:

Meanwhile… Ryoko blinked twice and looked up. "I wonder what the sword smith said to Hiei about his sword?" she wondered, then twitched and snuck down the hallway to his room. She looked around carefully, and not seeing him, crept in and walked over to his sword stand. She carefully pulled the katana out of its sheath and looked at it, and sighed in relief. It didn't even have a slight crack in it. She grinned evilly, and jumped out the window into the rapidly clearing afternoon, then began to run towards a large rock outcropping. Hiei, in the observatory, looked down and watched her running towards the rock. Then he noticed the sword in her hand. "Wait… no… that can't be… oh my god it is!" He yelled. "THAT'S MY KATANA!" He leapt out of the observatory and streaked like a black shadow down in front of Ryoko. She jumped and yelped in shock, then looked away and tried to hide the katana behind her back. "Give it here…" Hiei said sharply. "Give what here?" Ryoko replied innocently. "I'm not hiding anything behind my back or anything…" "Please just give it here." Hiei said coldly. "Umm… fine! I didn't need to use your sword to break the rocks blocking the entrance to the crystal caverns anyways!" She shoved it into his chest sideways, y'know? and huffily continued walking towards the rocks. "Crystal cavern?" Hiei said curiously as he tucked the sword into his belt and slowly started following her. "Yes, the crystal cavern, a place of magical power, has caved in and I was using your sword to try to open it!" she snapped sourly. "So that's why you broke my sword…?" He said curious and a tad angrily. She twitched and quickly said, "Broke? Broke? I didn't know you had a katana! I'd never just take it away. Why would I use your sword?" Hiei smirked knowingly and stared at the large pile of rubble they had arrived in front of. "So this is the fabled Crystal cave?" he asked. She looked at him and nodded. He sighed and looked at the pile of large boulders, then flexed his right shoulder and stood in a battle stance. Ryo looked at him, confused. Hiei smirked, then concentrated and a ball of darkness surrounded his hand. "Dragon of the Darkness Flame!" He shouted, and a large dragon of pure evil and negative energy summoned from the depths of spirit world appeared and streaked towards the rocks, causing them to instantly melt and open the way.

Ryoko stared at him. "Oh my gosh was that what I thought it was?" she wondered in awe. The dragon of the darkness flame… the most powerful darkness attack, and the only one who had truly mastered its ways and had finally consumed and been consumed by it. And he had simply used it to open the way for her! She looked at him, then smiled softly and said, "Thank you. Why did you do that for me?" He frowned thoughtfully and said, "I figured you must have a good reason for wanting to get into there. That and… it would cost too much to get my katana repaired again." Ryo's smile disappeared and was replaced by a scowl, and she stalked into the cave and went back to the secret passage in the back. Hiei blinked confusedly, then stealthily followed.

And here, the overtired author Narcissa takes a break from typing this story on cartoon Saturday night and starts dancing, boogying, bee-bopping, rapping, headbanging, and generally shaking her butt around to the opening of "One Piece" and later on now, the openings of "S-Cry-Ed" and "Paranoia Agent". NOTE: stuff like that happens when she's overtired. She loses control. (A/N: God I can understand that it's Saturday night on the fourth of July weekend but why the heck does everyone in the neighborhood have to light off fireworks at midnight/two am?)

Ryo walked into a small room that was lit by small candles in globes around the walls and reached into the small cabinet in the corner. As Hiei watched her, she pulled out a small vial that glowed green and popped it open, then poured it into what looked like a modified asthma breather device thingy. (A/N: She's gonna love this…) As Hiei confusedly watched her, she took it and slowly but steadily inhaled it until it was empty. Then Hiei asked her the ultimate question… "What are your pills and inhaler for?" Ryo looked at him sideways and said sourly, "You wouldn't believe me even if I did tell you the truth. It's too fantastical." Hiei frowned at her and said, "Try me." She looked at him and sighed, then said, "It's a long story, the short of it is that I am going to be the harbinger of the end of the world. The pills and inhaler keep the apocalypse trapped inside of me but one day it's going to break free and then there will be a lot of trouble." Hiei stared at her. "Apocalypse?" he asked curiously. "The end of the world is inside of me. According to Narcissa, I'm going to be a portal to the destroyers of worlds." Hiei blinked twice. "Narcissa knows about this too?" He asked curiously. "Yes, she's the one who developed the medicines and decided to stay here. I believe that even if the end of the world did come, she'd be able to find a way to destroy or stop it (A/N: OH god it's the killer kittens! Run! Never mind private joke…)." Ryo said, laughing slightly. Hiei laughed quietly as well, wondering how her life was knowing that someday she was destined to end the world, and then walked with her back out into the sunlight. She suddenly looked sideways at him and said, "There's no way for me to tell how or where on when the portal will open, and what will cause it's opening…" He blinked twice and smiled at her, shrugging slightly. She said softly, "Every time I get close to someone and I tell them about this, they run away." Hiei looked at her, and the look in his eyes told her what he thought of them. She blinked twice and blushed, then started walking quickly towards the house. He smirked slowly, and then hopped back into his room as the light of the setting sun illuminated the waves. Ryoko went to her room and started thinking about stuff. Ed, who was already in his room sulking, got up and went down to the kitchen to grab something to eat. Narcissa came in from the outside where she had been mowing the lawn (A/N: I hate mowing the lawn with a passion) and as she walked behind him, reached out and grabbed a bottle of water out of the fridge without looking and kept walking up the stairs, then walked into Ryo's room and the sounds of conversation floated down the stairs, along with laughter and the scent of nail polish. Ed stared after here, a bit miffed, then shrugged and went upstairs with a can of pop and a sandwich. Everyone soon fell asleep… except for Nar and Ryo. After grinning and waving bye to Ryo, Narcissa crept out onto the rooftop with piles of various brightly colored rocketing combustibles and handed them to her cleaning pixies with a plan. They went down to the yard and arranged them on the lawn, then started setting them off. Narcissa smiled and sighed, then lazily waited for everyone to get out there and watch. Soon enough, Ryoko came up, followed by Hiei and Ed. They all laid on their backs and watched the wonderful light show, then simply stared at the stars and made small talk until they all finally fell asleep.

Hope you all enjoy reading through this… six pages on Microsoft word! Please post your comments to my first posted story on here! More will soon come from Blood Moon Spinstress, you can be sure of that!


	4. Chapter 4

IDCA: Well okay! NarNar wrote the last chap of our great adventure. So I am going to do this one! Cause I can I know I can! I will! u

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As everyone drifted off to sleep after watching the fire works, Nar stayed up a little while. She yawned and gazed longingly at the stars. She suddenly heard a rustle from her right side. She look over to see Ed sitting up looking at the stars. He sighed wearily and rubbed his shoulder and looked around and froze when he realized Narcissa was watching. he looked away and frowned. Nar tilted her head wondering what was wrong with him. She slowly got up and sat beside our undercover murderer/assassin/henchman! (NO Nar what are you doing! hes evil!) Ed shuttered a little as if he feared human contact, Narcissa gently put her hand on his arm. "Ed are you okay?" she asked. Ed turned and looked her in the face. Narcissa frowned. Close up you could see the bags under his eyes, as if he had to much to worry about and not enough sleep. "I'm fine" Ed replied a little coldly. Nar sighed. "I wish you would talk to me more instead of just brushing me off" she snapped. Ed blinked "Well you don't quite open up to me!" He snapped back a little to loudly, because he woke Hiei up. Hiei blinked and look around the dark yard where they all layer on a large blanket. Ryo lay next to him and he was beside NarNar who was of course next to Ed. He looked at Ryo finally who was huddled in a ball with a lil white tail poking out of her back and where her ears where two white wolf ears. Hiei looked at Narcissa surprise on his face. "_wolf demon traits" _Narcissa mouthed to Hiei trying not to wake ryo up. Hiei Nodded and picked up Ryo and took her inside to her bed and made sure she was tucked in before going to bad himself. When Hiei had disappeared Narcissa turned on Ed "I don't open up to you!" She hissed Ed nodded angrily. "Fine I'll tell you about myself!" Nar said quickly. "My name is Narcissa Dark moon! And all that I can tell you is that I've lived at this house for about a year and a half! I'm a registered geniuses, and a high ranking warrior!" Ed nodded "what about you past? your family? Your life before this?" He asked. Narcissa frowned and looked at the ground "I... I don't really know..." she muttered. Ed raised and eyebrow "what do you mean?" he asked softly "I lost my memory...I woke up one day next to a river, that's all I can remember. Although I get flash backs now and then. I don't even know who my parents are" Nar finished looking a bit embarrassed. Ed smiled "That wasn't that hard was it?" nar frowned. "Don't mock me!" She whispered "And what about you Mr.Elric?"

Ed frowned. "I'm just a guy." he sighed. "Well I'd hope you were a guy!" Nar joked. Ed laughed lightly "But really who are your parents and stuff?" Narcissa asked. Ed frowned and told Narcissa about his father leaving and then his mother dieing when he and his younger brother were young, and that now his younger brother was lost somewhere working for a government organization he wasn't allowed to know about. (more common then you think). Narcissa sighed "And what do you do know?" She asked. Ed blinked "Not much, I travel around looking for jobs and stuff." he said using a cover. Narcissa smiled "see now that wasn't that hard was it?" She questioned. Ed smiled, Nar went to get up but as she did he didn't realize how her legs had gotten numb. she wobbled and suddenly fell on our under cover murderer/assassin/henchman! And not just falling! She fell straight on him! It all happened so fast Ed didn't have time to catch her, and the price of not chatting her? Ed and Narcissa looked at each other. She had fell and their lips had touched! She put her hand to her lips and blushed. Ed looked surprised then smiled. At the moment he didn't care that he was an undercover murderer/assassin/henchman, he took Narcissa hand and leaned in and kissed her softly then got up and went to the house wondering what chain of events that lilted kiss could start?

The next morning.

Ryo woke up and stretched, _"hnnnnnn what mayhem should I cause today?" _She thought getting out of bed looking for a shirt and some jeans. _"I could put a smoke bomb in the toilet? or...I could be good and change the oil on my bike? _She thought putting on a gray shirt. _"I should change the oil on the car." _ She continued, throwing on a pair on jeans that were way to big, she went and got a belt from the closet. then brushed her hair (although it didn't matter it still looked the same) then put on some raggedy tennis shoes. _"although I can put a smoke bomb in the toilet on my way out." _ She though smiling to herself as she grabbed her brown leather bag on the way out.

Ed was at the table pouring some alphabets cereal (they were out of coco puffs) Narcissa walked into the living room and collapsed on the couch. she didn't want to see Ed. She was still confused about the night before! well who wouldn't be? (AN/ I have writers block now...) (no really I've had it for like two weeks) Nar crept out of the house to town where she worked as a waitress in a dinner on the main street! She was running this morning cause someone had been messing with the clocks in the house again and she was now running late. She skidded down the street almost getting hit by oncoming traffic. Finally she made it to work. "Your late!" Her ill tempered boss yelled from the kitchen. Nar frowned. It was the first time she had ever been late. She sighed a put on her apron and went to take some body's order.

Back at home Ryo had decided to change the oil. Someone was using the toilet so she couldn't drop a smoke bomb. She sat down in the dirt in the garage next to her Honda Suzuki. She smiled at its exterior. Dark red with chrome fitting and pipes. But. . . The inside needed work. She sighed and got busy. About an hour later she was done. With a oil splattered face and hands, along with her cloths. She made her way into the house. She took a shower and on her way out dropped a smoke bomb in the toilet. She smiled to herself then put in some PJ's. She glanced at the clock. "Hn? 6:30? Nar should be getting home soon" she though.

At the dinner Narcissa was far from getting off work! Her crabby boss had made her stay over time and she wouldn't be getting home till around 11:30! She sighed tiredly and continued doing dishes. It was 7:45 now and she really wanted to go home. Suddenly the bell on the restaurant door opened. Ed elric walked through looking a bit scruffy. He looked around and blinked. Nar walked out of the kitchen and stopped. Ed smiled ruggedly and laughed. Nar blushed "What are you doing here?" she asked. Ed blinked "I'm hungry so I came to get something to eat." he frowned "why you don't want me here?" He went to turn and leave. "No!" narcissi said grabbing his hand. " I'd like the company." She smiled and Ed took a seat.

Back at the house Ryo had eaten some sugary stuff and was very hyper at the moment. Hiei was seated on the couch when it happened. At first it was soft. Like a harp being strum. Then it became louder, every second the noise grew more intense and loud till it bellowed with the force of a herd of elephants. Ryo cam slamming out of her room in a black tank top and those same baggy pants on she had that morning. She had her classic Austin guitar at her side and was playing it like a cheerleader on speed. Hiei blinked. She ran through the house, then came to a halt at the couch he was on. She collapsed breathlessly beside him. "You have a lot of energy" He said. "Yup!" Ryo responded. "To much energy" He finished. Ryo smiled. "yup yup! Hey wanna play my favorite game in the world!" she asked in a rush! Hiei blinked.

5 mins later………

Ryo sat on the couch next to hiei cross-legged with two extremely red cheeks. They had been playing "Slap Attack" A game where two people sat face to face very still with there hands on there knees. Then suddenly one person tries to slap the other on the cheek. If the person dodges then they win that round. Apparently Ryo had been losing. "Alright! I don't want to play anymore!" Ryo said flustered as she held her cheeks. Hiei smiled slightly and put his hands on the side of her cheeks (THE CHEEKS ON YOUR FACE PERV!) Ryo blushed. Hiei's hands glowed slightly and the pain in Ryo's face subsided. She smiled "Thank you" Hiei blushed slightly and turned away. Ryo looked at him. "_He was so nice when he wanted to be_" she thought. In fact it had been him who had carried her to her bed last night after the fireworks. Ryo smiled "Um hiei?" She asked. Hiei turned to her slightly frowning. "Hn?" He said simply. Ryo blushed crimson and got up. "Nothing!" She walk back to her room. Hiei sighed.

Ed and Nar had been at the café' drinking coffee. Finally it was time to go. Ed smiled and walked Narcissa home. They got to the house and ed smiled and let her in. when she was inside an arm grabbed Ed's arm. Ed's reflexes instantly allowed him to grab whoever it was. "Watch it!" A voice said from the bushes. Koenma appeared in the light. "Ed I've been watching you" He said a hint of anger in his voice. "I won't have the down fall of my father and my rise to the thrown threatened by two girls and a demon." Ed stared straight ahead like a solider being inspected. "I orderd you to kill Hiei. He is the only one who can get in my way now, and if that girl or anyone else is stopping you from doing that. . . . . .terminate them" The words hung in Ed's mind like shattered glass. How could he hurt Narcissa. She was the only one who had ever really shown sympathy for him. Now Koenma wanted him to hurt her? He didn't think it was possible for him. "ED!" Koenma hissed. " I want you mission completed in three days or I will see to it you never see your brother on this world again!" With that Koenma disappeared. Ed sighed and let his shoulders slump. He rubbed his left temple and walked tiredly in to the house. He walked upstairs and stopped in front of Narcissa's room. The door was open. She was asleep and looked so wonderful. Ed stopped and leaned on the door post. He sighed. Slowly he walked in and gently kissed Nar on he forehead. She sighed in her sleep and smiled. "How can I do this?" Ed whispered to the night,

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Okay that's done! Yay! Enjoy! R&R please! it's a way of life! And thatk youto the people who reviewed!

animeangel1313

DemonicStormFox

T.K. Yurikoto

You guys are awesome!


	5. Chapter 5

Nar: DIE WONNA WONGA! JABBA DE HUTTO! PH334 M3! J00 got PWNZ3D! Hee hee hee… how is everyone doing this day? Wonderful! Hopefully this will cheer ya up some! Ryo's done with chap four, so here's Chapter five of our misguided fanfic of doom and terror! And I've decided to make things a bit more twisted… extremely twisted… and dangerously cheesy… like cheetos! LOL…

Look at the lightning!

THE MORNING AFTER LAST NIGHT, WHICH WAS THE END OF THE DAY BEFORE TODAY AND AFTER THE DAY BEFORE YESTERDAY, AND IS STILL TWO DAYS BEHIND TOMORROW!

Ed Elric woke up in a sweat, gasping for breath. He had been having the most horrible nightmare of his little brother and Narcissa being tortured. His bed sheets were all twisted, and one pillow had been thrown across the room. He sat up and rubbed his face tiredly, shoulders sagging. "_If it's a question of who means more to me…"_ Ed thought tiredly, _"Then…." _He quietly remembered when he last saw his little brother, at the train station. He had smiled at Al and told him, "Don't worry, Big Brother will always protect you." Ed quietly gritted his teeth and stared at the bed sheet and his clenched fists, one human skin and one metal. _"I'm sorry, Narcissa… I have to protect Al."_

Narcissa woke up suddenly, an evil chill running down her spine. She shivered slightly, then slipped out of bed in a baggy white wife beater and baggy black and silver shorts. She padded barefoot down the hall and paused outside Ed's room, then peered in. He was wearing straight leg slightly baggy blue jeans with a silver chain and a dark red tee shirt, and was buffing his automail arm. She smiled, as his back was turned, and tiptoed in. Right as she was a foot behind him, he whirled around with a small dagger in his hand and snapped it up against her throat. She froze, eyes wide, and stared at him. He glared at her, then coldly said, "What do you want," still keeping the dagger at her throat. She swallowed softly and said, "Nothing…" in a quiet voice, then turned around and left. He stared after her, then transmuted the knife back into his arm and went and sat on his balcony.

Nar was sitting out in the hall next to her room, vacantly staring at the wall when Ryo came running down the hall, wearing a long, dark red skirt with a slit up the side, black tube top, black choker, and several black bracelets on her right arm, cackling madly. Hiei's voice could be heard yelling "WHY DID YOU STUFF MY PAJAMAS INTO THE TOILET WITH YOUR SMOKE BOMB YOU DIPWIT?". Nar didn't even blink when Ryo ran past and into her room, slamming and locking the door so hard that the sign on it flipped over and read, "Ryo's Room: KEEP OUT!" then in small print at the bottom "For your own safety Narcissa". Hiei pounded on Ryo's door for a while, then scowled and stalked down the hall into his own room, muttering about stupid women and their stupid games. Ryo peered out a few minutes after Hiei slammed his own door shut, and blinked twice at Nar. She reached behind her, grabbed her bag of super high bouncy balls, and started winging them at Narcissa. After Ryo's bag was empty, Narcissa turned and looked at her and said quietly, "What." Ryo blinked twice and said, "What's wrong with YOU?" then bounded down the hall and started poking Nar in the head. Nar scowled and walked into her room, shutting the door quietly. Ryo blinked twice, then tiptoed towards Ed's door. It slammed shut in her face. She flipped it off, then went downstairs and popped "My Best Friend's Wedding" into the DVD player and vegetated. Hiei, meanwhile, snuck out of his room and down the stairs, murder in his eyes…

Narcissa stared morosely at the wall, then went over and looked at her closet. (A/N: Two ways I could go about this…) She idly flicked through the rows of clothing, then an outfit wrapped in a bright red bag caught her attention. She pulled it out and stared at it, then smiled and carefully slipped it on. It was a bunny girl outfit top, the short black vest and little white lapels with a black bow, but it had no sleeves. The black bow had a medium/large golden bell attached to it that let out a faint "tinkle" noise when it moved. From the forearm down to the wrist was an incredibly baggy black gauntlet that overhung the bottom band and covered part of her hand. The vest top was a crop top, revealing her tummy, and then there was a somewhat tightly fitting black miniskirt below that. Chunky heeled black lace up knee-high boots over thigh high white socks over black fishnets that were barely visible completed the ensemble. She closed her eyes, and her black cat ears and tail popped out, adding the final finishing touches. (A/N: Yeah, I put a lot of thought into this outfit but hey, I like it a lot.) She smiled at her reflection in the mirror, then started to change back into her regular outfit… until she heard a scream from downstairs. She hurriedly yanked the gauntlets back on, then ran out and down the stairs to see what was wrong, praying for whoever it was's sake that it was good as a blush crept up her face.

Hiei was in the kitchen, holding Ryoko by her ears as she tried to twist/run away. She kept on letting out high-pitched yelps to try to distract him, but it wasn't working. He finally grabbed her around the waist, pushed her facedown on the floor, held her hands on either side of her and sat on her back. She growled, glaring at him with one eye, then got a pouty look. He scowled at her, and said, "I told you if you broke my katana again you'd pay to fix it yourself! Now fork over five hundred dollars!" She frowned, and said, "If you let me go I'll go collect that money for you," then fluttered her eyelashes at him. He scowled darker, and snapped "How much of a fool do you take me for?" He stood up and pulled her up by one wrist, gently though. She glared at him, breathing deeply, and said, "If you don't let me go, I'll scream." He snorted, then said, "Scream away." She breathed deeply a few times, then opened her mouth and screamed a scream that could have broken windows fifty miles away. Hiei winced and covered his incredibly sensitive ears, and Ryo took that chance to run outside. A deep rumble was heard, then she shot away on her motorcycle. He glared after her, muttering and rubbing his ears, and heard a clatter behind him. He spun around, then froze, staring at Nar. She was blushing, and looked around the kitchen with a look of extreme annoyance. "Who screamed and why?" she snapped. Hiei stared at her, looked her up and down slowly, then smirked and said, "Turn in a circle… and I'll tell you." Nar blushed deeper, then spun in a rapid circle and said, "Happy?" Hiei smirked slowly and said, "Ryo broke my katana again, and I told her last time that if she did it again she'd have to pay and now she wont ante up."

Narcissa sighed. "Ryo ryo ryo when will you learn?" she muttered quietly, as she walked over to the cupboard and pulled out the money jar. She pulled out five hundred dollars and handed it to Hiei. He smiled down at it, then looked at her and said, "You look nice in that outfit…" She blushed again, and spun around as Ed walked down the stairs. She blushed deeper, then leaned against the counter nolanchantly. Ed blinked twice at her outfit, then turned to Hiei with a deadly glare. "I need to see you outside Hiei." He said coldly. Hiei blinked twice at him, with a small frown. "I'm sorry, Ed, but my katana is still broken. I can't spar with you." Ed smirked extremely evilly, then said, "That just makes my job all the easier." He advanced quickly towards Hiei, alchemizing his arm into a sword as he moved. Hiei blinked twice, staring at Edward as though he could not believe what was happening. (A/N: Payne will be happening now… cheezit! --U) Narcissa blinked twice at Ed, then stepped between the two and put her arms out. "Stopit!" she snapped at Ed.

Ed glared at her, halting two feet away. "Get out of my way." He said in a deadly voice. She shook her head "No" very quickly, bracing her legs to get rid of the tremor in her knees. He scowled, and shot a look of pure evil at her. "Do you know how many women and children I've cut down? Now GET OUT OF MY WAY." Ed said in an icy voice. "No one will die in this house as long as I'm here to protect them." Narcissa said quietly. Ed gritted his teeth. Koenma's words rang through his head… _"If anyone gets in your way… terminate them… if you ever want to see your little brother alive again…"_ He swallowed hard, then whispered, "Fine then." He gritted his teeth, closed his eyes, and slammed his knife-arm forward into Nar's stomach. She stared at him for a few moments, then dropped to her knees, blood starting to trickle out of the side of her mouth. She stared down at the hole in her stomach, then covered it up with her hands and closed her eyes as she slumped sideways against the cupboards, breathing shallowly. Ryoko rode back up on her bike and stepped into the kitchen, then froze and stared at the scene before her.

Hiei was staring down at Nar's motionless body, shock rising in his stomach. He looked up at Ed, anger starting to show in his eyes. "How could you!" Hiei yelled. "She liked you! She trusted you! You were nice to her! What the h is wrong with you?" Ed was simply staring down at Narcissa. He blinked twice, swallowing hard, and looked up at Hiei, eyes starting to harden. Ryoko whimpered twice, then slid to her knees against the counter. Suddenly, Nar opened her eyes again and looked up at Ed. She struggled back to her feet, and stood in front of Hiei again with her arms out. "I… said," she said, with much effort, "No one… will die in this house… so long as… I'm here…" Ed stared at her, then reached out and grabbed her gently by the throat. "Woman, you're more trouble than you're worth." He said quietly, then threw her off to the side. She slid across the floor, leaving a trail of blood, and stopped right next to Ryoko. Ryo stared down at Nar, then back up at Ed with an extremely angry glare. She stood up and marched up to him, then shook her finger in his face and said, "How dare you! You loser! She finally opened up to someone and it turns out that he's an absolute jerk?" He glared down at her, and grabbed her wrist. "It's Koenma's orders." He said coldly. "It's my little brother's life." Narcissa blinked twice, lying spread eagle on her back on the floor. _"Koenma's orders? Heh… looks like I'm paying a little visit to Lord Koenma."_ She thought, then held her hands over her stomach. They glowed slightly, and the skin healed. She sat up gingerly, then closed her eyes and chanted an old and mystical sutra. Suddenly, there was a bright flash, and the world froze. Ed was glaring at Ryoko, one hand around her wrist, the other dripping with Nar's blood, face frozen in a sneer. Ryo had one finger up, and was trying to get her wrist out of Ed's grasp with an expression of annoyance. Hiei was staring at the two with an expression of surprise. Narcissa walked over to Ryoko and unfroze her, and then they walked outside, spread their angel wings, and flew to Spirit World.

Koenma was sitting at his desk, staring at a screen and watching Teletubbies™. He sighed blissfully, knowing that his faithful right hand alchemist was carrying out his dirty work and exterminating the annoying little fire demon Hiei Jaganshi. (A/N: He wishes...) He glanced at his video monitors of the human world, smirking slightly, then turned back to the Teletubbies™. He suddenly froze in his sucking of his pacifier, then turned back and stared at the human world monitors. They were all frozen at the exact same moment. Nothing moved. Koenma frowned, then scowled as he stared at the door. Very few humans knew the mantra to access Spirit World with the rest of the human world frozen in time. There were suddenly several very loud explosions outside, then his doors flew open and Ryoko and Narcissa walked out of the cloud of smoke and into Koenma's office. He stared at them nervously as the door slammed shut again. They stalked up to his desk and glared at him. "Why are you having Edward Elric kill Hiei Jaganshi?" Narcissa snapped, slamming her hand down onto his desk. Ryo glared angrily at him. "What do you two care if Hiei dies? It's none of your problem." Koenma said evilly, glaring at the two girls. "I CARE! IT'S MY HIEI-KUU!" Ryoko snapped, anger crackling in her voice as her eyes glowed and turned yellow. "If someone dies in our inn then it will reflect badly upon us!" Narcissa yelled. "Now tell us why he has to die!" they snapped in unison.

(A/N: Hmm… why oh why would Koenma want the foursome dead? Hmm… .) (makes a few more sigs and avvies) (mm kay I have a reason) Koenma sighed and stared at the two girls. "I ordered Mr. Elric to kill Hiei because I wish to obtain the turf that his gang rules in Spirit World." Koenma said sourly. "My father and I have been running the front for a long time and have most of the property in Spirit World. However, Mr. Jaganshi and his friends, Mr. Yuske Urameshi, Mr. Kazuma Kuwabara, and Mr. Suichi Minamoto managed to capture a large portion of our turf. We wish to get it back." Koenma sighed. "Happy now?" He asked. Ryoko stared at him. "Couldn't you just get him to sign over a paper saying that you now owned his turf?" Narcissa asked. Koenma frowned. "I suppose… but it's Hiei we're talking about. He'd probably snort at me and say no." Ryoko smiled slightly. "I'm sure we can convince him." She said slyly. Nar nodded and said worriedly, "If Hiei signs the papers…" "Ed will be free." Koenma said with an air of authority. Narcissa nodded, closed her eyes, and concentrated. In a sudden glow of light Hiei appeared next to Ryo. He blinked twice and looked around. Ryoko shoved a paper and pen in front of him. "Hiei, sign on this line so that your turf will go back to Koenma so that Ed wont have to kill you!" she said in a rush. He blinked twice and stared at it. "So that's why he's trying to kill me?" Hiei asked slowly. "Yes." Koenma said affirmatively. Hiei suddenly started laughing. Everyone looked at him, surprised. He smirked, signing the paper, and said, "We were actually looking to return the turf when you attacked. We're freelancers, we have no need for land." He then handed back the paper. Koenma examined it, and then nodded. He waved his hand, and everything flew back to the way it was.

A/N: I JUST WENT ON VACATION FOR A WEEK SO FORGIVE ME IF THIS NEXT PART FLOWS ALONG A DIFFERENT LINE.

Nar blinked twice from her spot, leaning against the cupboard, smear of blood leading towards Ed. Ed blinked twice and shook his head, frowning. He let go of Ryoko's wrist, and took two steps back, clutching the sides of his head. Hiei blinked twice and looked around, then looked up at the ceiling innocently as his hand reached out and grabbed the counter to see if it was real. When he realized it was, he coughed quietly and stuffed his hands in his pockets. Ryoko was rubbing her wrist, and smiling happily. Koenma suddenly appeared in front of Ed. "Edward Elric, your mission has been completed. The murder of Hiei Jaganshi is no longer your objective. You are free." Koenma said, then disappeared in a fluff of smoke. Ed blinked twice, looked around the kitchen without meeting anyone's eyes, then ran upstairs to his room. The sound of a door shutting echoed through the house. Ryoko walked over to Nar and knelt down next to her. "That's a neat trick, healing yourself." Ryo said with a grin. Narcissa grinned back, but it was a pained grin. "It only healed the skin." She said quietly. Ryo frowned, then her eyes widened as she realized what that meant. Hiei walked over, and together they carried Nar to the hospital, where she was hooked up to machines and healed. The doctors wanted to keep her overnight darn useless doctors, so she smiled at Hiei and Ryo and told them to go home. They left, hand in hand, not seeming to realize that they were holding hands.

THE END!

No… no luck for you…

When Ryo and Hiei got home, the blood on the floor had been cleaned up and there was a note on the counter. Opening it, Ryo read: "I'm sorry to have caused you this trouble. Ed" Inside was that month's rent money. Ryo sighed and stuck the rent money in the money jar. _He left without saying goodbye to Narcissa… _Ryoko thought quietly, then went and put Resident Evil into the DVD player. Hiei came in and quietly sat next to her on the couch, popcorn bowl in his hands. He carefully placed it on the couch between them, and grabbed a handful. Without looking, she reached out to grab her own handful, and their hands brushed. He continued to stare at the movie, absently munching on his popcorn, as she turned and looked at him sideways. When the popcorn bowl was almost empty, about midway through the movie, he reached his hand in again. Ryo quickly slipped her own hand into the bowl, and they grabbed each other's hands. Hiei smiled quietly, then turned and looked at her, still holding her hand. She blushed a bit. He quietly raised their hands into the air, and said, "Your hand is so small…" She blushed a bit deeper as he carefully spread their fingers so they were palm to palm. His hand was larger than hers, and he smiled softly as he slipped his fingers between hers and laced their hands together. He then gently reached out his other hand and cupped her cheek with it. He opened his mouth to say something, but she gently reached up and put her finger over his mouth. He closed it, blushing at her closeness, and looked off to the side. She smiled, leaned forward, and gently kissed him on the mouth.

_What the… what am I doing?_ Hiei thought to himself. _She's a human! _He quietly studied her as she pulled back, blushing. _I… I should not be doing what I am doing… but…_ he thought, and then leaned in and kissed her again. They kissed for several moments, then Ryoko blinked twice and pulled away. Hiei frowned, slightly confused. She jumped up and ran up the stairs, and he heard her door shut. He quietly plopped back on the couch, staring at the movie without seeing it. He raised one hand and put it to his mouth, feeling the warmth still on it, and frowned to himself. _Am I that bad of a kisser? _He wondered. Shaking his head, Hiei clicked off the TV and went to take a cold shower. (A/N: Mua ha ha! Hiei wondering if he's "That bad of a kisser"… that's a riot...)

Ryoko sat alone in her room near the window, staring out at the night. She was puzzling over the little fire demon who seemed so tough but could be so nice and… loving? She frowned and rapidly shook her head back and forth. _NO no NO! Bad Ryo! Do NOT fall for him!_ She thought angrily. She glared at the mirror on her dresser for a few moments, then sighed and dropped her head into her hands. _Who am I trying to fool… I've already fallen for him, hook, line, and sinker…_ she thought silently (A/N: although I hope a thought would be silent). Suddenly, the "Wanta Fanta" dancers went through the whole house, causing much ruckus. Both Hiei and Ryo stuck their heads out their doors and stared after them as they left. They then looked at each other, blushed, and ducked back into their respective rooms.

Narcissa stared at the sliver of moon showing through the window as she lay on her hospital bed. It was incredibly quiet at the hospital, and she was on the thirteenth floor. She sighed quietly, and closed her eyes as she heard footsteps down the hall. _Stupid doctors…coming to check on me again… have they never heard of going home for the night?_ She wondered irately, breathing slowly and deeply so as to fool the doctor. The door clicked open, and the footsteps softly entered the room as the door clicked shut. Nar's back tensed automatically, and she had to put an effort to keeping her breathing steady. Whoever was in the room with her, it was not a doctor. Doctors did not wear boots and… squeak squeak leather pants… and click ever so softly? The footsteps stopped right next to her bed, and she heard a soft sigh. She slowly opened her mouth, and turned her head to the side. If they tried anything, she would scream as loudly as she could.

Ed stared down at Nar as she slept. The sliver of moon that was shining through the window lay on her face, and she looked incredibly peaceful. He quietly sighed. _I told myself that I wouldn't come back… that it would be too painful… for both of us… so what am I doing here now?_ He quietly wondered to himself. He gently reached out one hand and held it right next to her cheek, not quite touching her skin. Pulling his hand back, he looked down at her stomach. Bandages covered a pretty good chunk of it. He walked down and picked up the doctors clipboard. _Cut diaphragm, stomach, liver, intestines… I really hurt her…_he thought sadly, and replaced the clipboard. She shifted quietly in her sleep, and he tensed up. "Ahh… Ed… where are you…" she quietly muttered in her sleep. He walked up next to her, then looked around the room. He carefully picked up a metal vase from the corner, and closed his eyes as he transmuted it. From beneath her eyelids, Nar watched him, surprised at the sadness on his face, especially when she said his name "in her sleep". He walked over to her bedside table and gently put something on it, then left with his hands in his pockets. She opened her eyes and looked at it. It was a rose, made of metal and perfectly sculpted down to the last drops of water on the petals. She gritted her teeth, yanked out her IV tubes, ripped open the door, and started running barefoot down the hall after the footsteps.

Ed looked back over his shoulder, hearing a soft pattering noise from behind him. His eyes widened in shock as he saw Narcissa, one hand holding her stomach and the other shoving open doors and shoving carts out of her way as she ran full tilt after him. He turned around and ran down to the elevator and desperately hit the button. The door opened, and he jumped on and shut the doors as she ran up. Hitting the elevator button in frustration, she scowled and started sliding down the rail of the stairs. As she ran out on the ground floor, the elevator dinged and Ed stepped out of it, hands in pockets, head bowed. She ran up behind him and hugged him tightly. He gasped and stiffened. "I… I understand that you had to do it because of Koenma threatening your little brother! Please… don't leave… I… I…" she cried, then faltered. He sighed quietly, then turned around and looked at her. He had dark lines around his eyes and looked very sad. Her eyes teared up a bit as he said roughly, "I can't stay." "Why not?" she questioned softly. He bit his lower lip and looked off to the side. She gently but firmly grabbed his chin and turned it so he was looking her in the eyes. "Please… it would mean a lot to me." She said softly. He looked pained, and placed one hand on her stomach. "Do you really mean that?" He asked quietly, hope starting to show in his eyes.

Told you it was getting cheesy.

Shrug Anyways.

Nar nodded, and hugged him. He sighed happily, and buried his face in her shoulder. "I thought… I thought you'd hate me…" He whispered. "Never…" she whispered in return. He escorted her back to her room, and stayed in the chair by her side all night.

FINALLY! NO MORE CHEESE! It hurt me as much to type that as it did you to read it. But it was necessary, no? Do not by a long shot think this is the end… LOL… your not getting off so easy Ryo chan… now for a bit it's gonna be freestyle create your own plot… so here's a bit of a start for ya.

Ryoko sat up the next morning, blearily rubbing her eyes. She stared around her room, then flopped back into her bed. She suddenly froze, then sat up with one green eye staring at the foot of her bed. Rando was sitting there, cross-legged, leering at her. "I've been hunting you for a long long time now, little miss Ryoko…" he said evilly. "I plan to ruin your life as much as you ruined mine."

READ AND REVIEW! GRACIAS! Ducks some blows from Lance for using gracias personal joke nevamind


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